Work is Kicking My Ass!

Work, yesterday, was rather labor intensive, as Tuesday's have been lately for me, but only lasted a sweet 8 hours.

I come home, take a shower, and Rhonda suggested I look for a job in Salem as we are again intending on getting our asses out of this noisy neighborhood. Next thing I know, I can't read. I can't focus on the words, though with effort I could read the words but not completely comprehend. Rhonda told me I didn't look well and should probably take a nap. A three hour nap later!...

I realized yesterday that I am indeed exhausted. I start my day between 3 and 4 in the morning which gives me the wake up time between 1:30 and 2:30 am. I drive to Eugene on my long days, which is an 11-15 hour day. I shouldn't stay up past 7 but often do because I feel like I'm missing out on life. I have split days off, Thursday and Sunday. I never fully recover from my work with that brief time.

Yesterday, I realized I need a month off. But where the f*** do I think I live? Europe!? This is America where humans are resources to be worked until DEAD!

This has really been rough on my short-term memory. One of many examples I could give you from just this morning is as I was tying my shoes, I forgot that I had tied my left one and went to tie it again.

Rhonda gave me a wonderful back rub yesterday, and we got to talking about abuse. This is like a re-enactment of my abuse. Abuse victims often do this shit. Recovery is a PROCESS. It doesn't simply heal then go away. You often have to work it and it often works its way into your life without you being aware of it. My work is abusive to me.

This, in the last several work days, has produced sloppy work on my part. I'm f****** exhausted. I'm still doing damned good work, just making more mistakes than usual.

Hey, Ridwan! I forgot to e-mail you! We're going huckleberry picking this weekend. Unless you want to join us in the Giff on Sunday, we may have to postpone getting together until next week sometime. Good health to you, too, brother!

Where was I...shit, I forgot. Work is killing me.

Be sure to read the several other posts I made, I've been up since midnight 30 because I couldn't go back to sleep. I figured I'd catch up on my posting. Still far from catching up on my reading. Maybe this afternoon?