I Haven't Written a Poem...

I haven't written a poem in a long time.

I haven't written a poem
about the beauty in the world I see
every time I look
into Shusli's eyes.

I haven't written a poem
about how Felicia is learning to rebel
how she is embarassed to be seen with me
in public
How she would much rather
spend all her time with her friends
than anywhere near me
How it hurts and how it makes me laugh

Shusli laughs too
but not out of heartlessness
Out of complete understanding
as she has been through this twice
and knows what I am and will be going through
and knows that she will be there
to help...
really help...
with all of it.

I haven't written a poem
about how much I mess Yeti cat
Bath Matt
bringer of tobacco, cabbage leaves, corn cobs, badmitton birdies
His soft fur
his goofy demeanor
His flying leap at me
for closing the door before he could get out.

Nor have I written about
how much it hurt
losing a grandson
not yet born
Nor feeling empathy
for the loss Eli and Suzette must feel.

I haven't written poems
about the rage I feel
seeing the bruises on Rachel
after being attacked by "meth heads."
I'll leave it at that
because I could leave this
with bloody fantasies
leaving a couple of folks horribly mangled
or worse.

KBOO is a place
where I first read on the airwaves
in a forum where I am heard by folks
I don't have the honor of seeing.
It's "membership drive,"
and we are way behind.
KBOO is the only place
where you can hear so many voices
that it is like the weather here in Portland,
Wait a few minutes
and you will experience
something completely different.

I haven't written poems
about the monks in Burma, Myanmar
who are being murdered under a military dictatorship
and the people thereof
are being brutally oppressed.

I haven't written poems
of doing math in my head
realizing the Makah have killed 2 whales
in 7 years
and thousands have been killed by
Norway, Japan, Indigenous Russians, Indigenous in Alaska
by environmental damages
and even though I know these get protested
Nothing anywhere near
the intensity and vile race hatred comes out
for anyone but the Makah.
You'd think that the voices allegedly against whaling
would be thousands of more times intense
for Norway, Japan, the Environment, etc.,
but they are not
because they aren't a bunch of Red Niggers
who no longer want to be
under the thumb
of oppressive white folks.

I haven't written poems lately
of how wonderful it feels to be
in Shusli's arms
To hold here
and feel her beautiful body next to mine

Nor have I written poems about how wonderful it feels
knowing Shusli and I make a great team
as we learn more and more
how to be a great team.

I haven't written poems
about how wonderful it feels
wrapping my arms around her in bed
and knowing that I will feel her there
thousands and thousands more times
before we decide to leave this world.

I haven't written poems
about the terror and death
that the U.S. government
is putting our fellow human beings
Iraqi's
through
in order to steal their wealth
for the already wealthy.

I haven't written a poem about my Camera
an Olymps S550UV
with 18x zoom
how fun it is to take photographs
and find the beauty in the world
of a brief moment
a memory where memory fails
or not

I haven't written a poem about how happy I am
How privileged and honored I feel
to be here
in this time
in this world
with all of you.

I haven't written a poem
where I have said "thank you,"
to y'all

so....

THANK YOU!